You know you’re a big nerd when your conversations with friends go something like this:

Zhu: mu
Amy: cows?
Zhu: E[R]
Amy: *sigh*

So, I live in this apartment with these old style radiators that are super active. I mean, in the middle of the night, I’ll wake up in a sweat even as I leave my windows open. And just earlier today, as I was trying to study for my Macro exam, I noticed myself feeling very dizzy as I continuously chugged bottle after bottle of Poland Spring. I’m starting to think that it’s going to be a close call. What’s going to kill me first? Exams, or my radiator?

And now, a few words of wisdom from Macroeconomics… He’s got a little bit to share on every topic, it seems!

Intellectual property rights:

If you cannot sell your ideas, no one invents except wackos.

Graduate school admissions:

The quadratic formula is the most useless formula in the world, but you need to know this to get into graduate school.

Saddlepaths, horses, and interesting relationships with your spouse:

[Professor recommends rolling a marble down the middle of a saddle to understand the concept of a saddlepath.]

Even if you don’t have a horse, you can try this with a cat, or maybe your husband.

Family planning in Africa:

Usually family planning programs work by sending a group of nuns, who are experts at not having children, and letting them distribute family planning materials.

The value of children:

The number of children per family seems to decrease with income. We like to think that parents love their children. So why are children inferior goods?

Europeans:

These Europeans met in Lisbon some time ago and proclaimed that Europe would be the most technologically advanced society in the world by 2010. I think they just said this to show that they have a sense of humor.

And finally, in the tradition of John Stuart Mills 150 years before him, our professor ponders whether it’s true that “It is better to be a human being dissatisfied than a pig satisfied; better to be Socrates dissatisfied than a fool satisfied.”

Some people might say that being educated allows you to enjoy things that stupid people can’t enjoy, like… What do you call this thing when fat people scream? Oh! Opera!

So, I’ve continued my fall off the face of the earth. Tomorrow, I hope to not fail my micro exam… We’ll see how that goes. This probably implies that I should be studying right now, rather than updating this blog. Right. Also, I would like to thank all my friends/acquaintances for google-stalking me and thus stumbling upon this place. It makes me feel popular just hearing about it, and we all need that kind of boost every once in a while!

Oh, here’s my attempt to combine blogging and studying. May I present… Quotes from Microeconomics! But first, a little background. Our professor likes to ask us questions during class. Usually we just stare at him blankly and refuse to answer, allowing the little undergrad in our class to answer all the questions for us. Occasionally, this bothers the professor, who appears to somewhat care about our learning process.

You’re all looking at me so strangely, like I’m speaking in Chinese or something. Actually, it’s much worse than that. I’m sure some of you understand Chinese.

I have a signalling problem. When I ask a question like, “Is this clear?” and no one says anything, I don’t know whether to assume that everyone knows everything, or you’re all so lost that you can’t even ask for help.

In light of these quotes, I’m sure you now understand my predictament. *sigh* Back to studying.

(Regarding Mas-Colell’s Microeconomic Theory textbook).

After the professor struggled to keep our ancient classroom window closed, a student stands up and drops Mas-Colell in front of the window, effectively using the book as a door stop.

Prof: That book is good for something after all. I knew it was so thick for a reason.

I don’t remember if I’ve told you, gentle reader, but I’ve recently made some interesting discoveries. Most important amongst them is the discovery that I did not actually have a normal undergraduate experience.

I say this because now, my apartment building is situated minutes from Columbia’s campus with fraternities on one side and an undergraduate dorm on the other. On any given Thursday, Friday, or Saturday night, loud music can be heard blasting from stereos all around us.

Previously, I had heard reports that Thursday was the new Friday, but now I get to experience first hand as the 3-day long festivities begin shortly after I find a moment to catch my breath between two traumatic weeks. As I overhear the drunken conversations outside my window, I recall my own undergraduate experience, where I never took weekends off and I certainly never participated in such extended celebrations.

But today, on Sunday night, I hear silence from my window as all of the little freshmen scurry back to their dorms, as if suddenly remembering that they were here to get an education. Meanwhile, I savor the peace and quiet as I ponder whether to actually read my textbooks.